5.14 pm 8 april 2016

the fog is back
I’m running
the blur ropes around my ankles and
my neck
is choked by the undefined
fingers and claws
I know it’s just air and water and my imagination
isn’t real; it’s all in my head
but I swear you don’t know what it’s like
at my age
when the path my feet are on is disintegrating
and my heart stops and starts beating indeterminately
I can’t decide if
I want to set my brain on fire
or my head in ice
I swear
you don’t know what it’s like
I’m willing to give it all up
willing to make it all stop
just for a brief moment of clarity
the second before nothing and everything

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